Food Jokes

You came here looking for burger jokes and we have scoured the universe (AKA Google) for the best burger jokes online. They cover standard burger jokes, hamburger jokes, Burger King jokes and the not so tasteful horse burger jokes! There’s even a few unique jokes within the 100+ burger jokes: yes we wrote NEW jokes!!! […]

I’m not that keen on cannibal jokes, I was raised by a strict mother who taught me NEVER to play with my food, some cannibal jokes would disappoint my late and tasty mother! Best Cannibal Jokes Best Cannibal Joke 1What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a […]

What do you get when you cross an egg with a sperm? An omlette you probably shouldn’t eat.

Three men are in a bar having a drink. When a gorgeous woman comes up to them and says, WOMAN: Whoever can use the words ‘liver’ and ‘cheese’ in a creative sentence can date me for tonight. 1ST MAN: I love liver and cheese! WOMAN: That’s not good enough! 2ND MAN: I hate liver and […]

Funny Apple Jokes Funny Apple Jokes 1 What did one maggot say to the other who was stuck in an apple? Worm your way out of that one, then! Funny Apple Jokes 2 The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple. Funny Apple Jokes 3 Why did Eve want to move […]

Funny Banana Jokes Funny Banana Jokes 1 Why are bananas never lonely? Because they hang around in bunches. Funny Banana Jokes 2 What’s yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana. Funny Banana Jokes 3 How do you catch King Kong? Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana. Funny Banana […]

Restaurant Joke 1 A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn’t pay for your sandwich!” […]

How do you know if the head chef is a clown? When the food tastes funny.

This guy went into a restaurant and ordered his meal. When the waitress came out with his soup, he noticed that she had her thumb stuck into it. This upset him, but he let it go. She then brought out his chili, and again her thumb was in the food. He let it go again. […]

Food Joke 1 Q. What did the salt say to the pepper? A. Hey Baby, What’s SHAKING! Food Joke 2 One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself. Tom wasn’t happy about that: “When […]

Waiter Waiter Joke 1 Waiter, waiter! Bring me a crocodile sandwich, and make it snappy!. Waiter Waiter Joke 2 A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, […]

One day George W. Bush went out to dinner with a Jewish friend. The friend recommended a kosher place nearby. They arrived and Dubya’s friend ordered them both the house specialty: matzo ball soup. The waiter brought the bowls and George looked at the soup suspiciously, but his friend urged him to try at least […]

Question: Why did the chicken lay her eggs on a axe? Answer: She wanted to hachet Question: What do you call a egg who’s done lots of things? Answer: An egg who has a lot of eggsperience. Question: Where do you find information about eggs? Answer: In the hen-cyclopedia Question: Why is the chef so […]

A man was visiting Spain and passed by a restaurant in Madrid after a bullfight. They were advertising that they served the balls of the bull who lost the bullfight. Intrigued, the man went inside, only to find that there was a six-week waiting list to get to eat the loser’s balls. So he signed […]

An old man and a young man work together in an office. The old man always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and the young man really loves peanuts. One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the […]

A man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw a man eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. “Why are you eating grass?” he asked the man. “I don't have any money for food,” the poor man replied. “Oh, please come […]

The French existentialist Jean-Paul Sartre was sitting in a cafe when a waitress approached him: “Can I get you something to drink, Monsieur Sartre?” Sartre replied, “Yes, I’d like a cup of coffee with sugar, but no cream”. Nodding agreement, the waitress walked off to fill the order and Sartre returned to working. A few […]

My brother Sean stopped by a sandwich shop one afternoon and placed his order with the girl at the counter. She rattled off a list of condiments, but he stopped her when she asked if he wanted white cheese or yellow. “What’s the difference?” Sean asked. “Hello?” replied the girl, sighing and rolling her eyes. […]

A magazine reporter is traveling through a rainforest, in search of a fabled cannibalistic tribe. He falls into a trap, goes unconscious and wakes up tied to a stake with a fire burning slowly underneath him. He cries out for help, and is answered by what is obviously one of the tribesmen, who informs him […]