Articles by Funny Joker

Viagra Joke 01 A crate load of Viagra has been stolen from a distribution depot, police are looking for hardened criminals. Viagra Joke 02 A man and his wife went to the chemist to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price, the man was astonished – but his wife had […]

Shocked and Tough Babies Picture Caption Please add your funny picture caption below.

Idiot And Fool Joke 1 Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on the roof, laying tile, when a sudden gust of wind came and knocked down their ladder. “I have an idea,” said Mike. “We ll throw you down, and then you can pick up the ladder.” “What, do you think I m stupid? […]

What does a bulimic call two fingers? Dessert.

50 Best Joke 1 Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH? A: A blonde going through a flashing red light. 50 Best Joke 2 The officer shouted orders to a nearby soldier. With considerable bravery, the GI ran directly onto the field of battle, in the line of fire, to retrieve a dispatch case from […]

What do you get when you have 32 rednecks in a room? A full set of teeth.

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting together for Christmas, they discussed the Christmas gifts they were able to give their elderly mother. The first said, “I built a big house for our mother this Christmas.” The second said, “For Christmas I sent her a Mercedes.” The third smiled and […]

Christmas Joke 1 What do monkeys sing at Christmas ? Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. ! Christmas Joke 2 Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters ? They both drop their needles ! Christmas Joke 3 What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas ? Thanks, I ll never part with […]

How many dumb blonde jokes are there? None, they’re all true!

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless to say, the help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for “Termination without Cause.” Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee with a caller: “Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?” “Yes, well, I’m having […]

Children Joke 1 A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: “What does the cow say?” Child: “Moo!” Mother: “Great! What does the cat say?” Child: “Meow.” Mother: “Oh, you re so smart! What does the frog say?” And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her […]

A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.” The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. “You don’t have […]

How many old time gangsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? We ain’t sayin’ nuthin’, see?

What will my computer printer warranty cover? Your mouse pad

An English patient was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and pad by the bed. With his last ounce of strength he wrote a note, dropped it, and died. The son was so overcome with grief that he […]

Dance Joke 1 Q. What do you have when only one line dancer comes to your party? A. A One Liner! Dance Joke 2 Q. What do you call two line dancers doing the dance Shoot the Rooster? A. A Pair of Shoot (parachute) Dance Joke 3 Q. What do you call a one legged […]

Knock Knock! Who’s there? A little girl. A little girl who? A little girl who can’t reach the doorbell!

Redneck Jokes 101 to 200 Other Redneck Jokes Redneck Jokes 1 to 100 Redneck Jokes 101 to 200 Redneck Jokes 201 to 300 Redneck Jokes 301 to 400 Redneck Jokes 401 to 500 Redneck Jokes 501 to 600 Redneck Jokes 601 to 700 Redneck Jokes 701 to 800 Redneck Jokes 801 to 900 Redneck Joke […]

Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Because the sound of zippers scares away the sheep.

A guy was seated next to a 10-year-old girl on an airplane. Being bored, he turned to the girl and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.” The girl, who was reading a book, closed it slowly and said to the guy, “What […]

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her more beautiful, so she left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point. […]

What is the similarity between a shrimp and a man? You can enjoy all but the head. What is the similarity between a dolphin and a man? They are both said to be intelligent, but no one can prove this. What is the similarity between a microwave oven and a man? They both get hot […]

What do you call a poodle with no legs? A sponge.

A man visits the doctor’s because he has a severe stuttering problem. After a thorough examination, the doctor consults with the patient. Doctor: “It appears that the reason for your stuttering is that your penis is about six inches too long and it is thus pulling on your vocal cords, and thereby causing you this […]

“Big scandal on the new ‘Survivor’ series. The white, the black and the Hispanic teams were caught cheating off the Asian team.” –Jay Leno “The hot gossip in Washington is that Condoleezza Rice might have a new boyfriend. Secretary of State Rice is being linked to Canada’s Foreign Minister, Peter MacKay. It’s gotta be awkward […]

Restaurant Joke 1 A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn’t pay for your sandwich!” […]

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife “Mother of Six” in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it’s time to go home and wants to find out if his […]

A judge asks a defendant to please stand. “You are charged with murdering a school teacher with a chain saw.” From out in the audience a man shouts, “You lying bastard!” “Silence in the court!” the judge shouted back. He turns to the defendant again and says, “You are also charged with killing a paperboy […]

Various Animal Joke 1 What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away! Various Animal Joke 2 What animal do you look like when you get into the bath ? A little bear ! Various Animal Joke 3 A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a […]

A cowboy rides his horse up to a saloon. All the patrons gawked as the cowboy kissed his horse on the butt before coming in and asking for a drink. The bartender serves him and asks, “Mind if I ask why’d ya kiss your horse on the butt?” The cowboy says, “It’s ’cause I got […]