Tax Jokes for Accountants

I know it’s hard to believe, but a small minority of tax accounts have an actual sense of humour and will find these accounting tax jokes funny! Nah, just pulling your leg, accountants have no sense of humour, there’s no funny bone function on a abacus.

Tax Jokes for Accountants 1
What’s the definition of a good tax accountant?
The accountant has a tax loophole named after them!

Tax Jokes for Accountants 2
What’s a shy and retiring tax accountant?
A tax accountant who is half a million shy and that’s why he’s retiring.

Tax Jokes for Accountants 3
What do tax accountants suffer from that ordinary people don’t?
Depreciation.

Tax Jokes for Accountants 4
How can you tell when the Chief Tax Accountant is getting soft?
When he actually listens to Marketing before saying No

Tax Jokes for Accountants 5
Why do tax accountants get excited on Saturdays?
They can wear casual clothes to work

Tax Jokes for Accountants 6
Three partners in an accounting firm go out to lunch. They are the audit partner, the tax partner and the senior partner. One of them sees a brass lamp lying in the gutter. Curious, they pick it up and give it a rub.
Instantly, a genie appears. “You know the deal,” says the genie. “Three wishes. But seeing there are three of you, you can have one wish each.”
“Great,” says the audit partner. “Take me to the Whitsunday Islands, give me a blonde and an endless supply of XXXX and leave me there for ever.”
Pouf! There is a flash of light, a puff of smoke and he is gone.
“Now me,” says the tax partner. “Take me to the Cook Islands, give me two blondes and an endless supply of offshore tax schemes and leave me there for ever.”
Pouf! There is a flash of light, a puff of smoke and he is gone. The genie turns to the senior partner. “And what do you want?”
“I want those two back in the office straight after lunch.”

Tax Jokes for Accountants 7
What do you call a tax accountant without a spreadsheet?
Lost

Tax Jokes for Accountants 8
Who was the first tax accountant?
Adam. He got interested in figures, turned the first leaf, made the first entry, lost interest after withdrawal, buggered up the monthly accounts and raised the first tax liability.

Tax Jokes for Accountants 9
What would Economics be without assumptions?
Tax accounting

Tax Jokes for Accountants 10
Accountant after reading nursery rhymes to his young child: “No, son. When Little Bo Peep lost her sheep that wouldn’t be tax deductible, but I like your thinking”.

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