Baby Daddy Joke 1
My baby is the spitting image of his Daddy.
Never mind, just so long as he’s healthy.
Baby Daddy Joke 2
There was a dad who tried to keep his wife happy through labor by telling jokes, but she didn’t laugh once. Know why?
It was the delivery.
Baby Daddy Joke 3
Why did the baby monster put his father in the freezer?
Because he wanted frozen pop.
Baby Daddy Joke 4
I see the baby’s nose is running again,” said a worried father.
“For goodness sake!” snapped his wife. “Can’t you think of anything other than horse racing?”
Baby Daddy Joke 5
Why was the baby strawberry crying?
Because his mom and dad were in a jam.
Baby Daddy Joke 6
My friend’s gambling is getting out of hand. He just bet his newborn son in our game of poker…
And I thought, “I might have to raise him.”
Baby Daddy Joke 7
The nurse told the parents of a newly born child, “You have a cute baby.”
The smiling husband said, “I bet you say that to all new parents.”
“No,” she replied, “just to those whose babies really are good-looking.”
The husband again asked, “So what do you say to the others?”
The nurse replied, “The baby looks just like you.”
Baby Daddy Joke 8
Three men were discussing at a bar about coincidences. The first man said, ” my wife was reading a “tale of two cities” and she gave birth to twins”
“That’s funny”, the second man remarked, “my wife was reading the three musketeers and she gave birth to triplets”
The third man shouted, “Good God, I have to rush home!”
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, “When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves”!!!
Baby Daddy Joke 9
Daddy, daddy, can I have another glass of water, please?
But that’s the tenth one I’ve given you tonight!
Yes, but the baby’s bedroom is still on fire.
Baby Daddy Joke 10
What did one fire tell to her husband after their son’s birth?
Honey… this is Arson.
Baby Daddy Joke 11
Why did the man bring his pregnant wife a small lizard?
She told him to pick up a baby monitor.
Baby Daddy Joke 12
A couple is having a baby soon.
After hearing the results show that it’s a boy, the husband says, “Let’s name him Pete!”
But the wife says, “Honey, I’m having twins.”
“Well, then the second one is called RePete.”
Baby Daddy Joke 13
I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant, but apparently it just changes the color of the baby.
Baby Daddy Joke 14
What did baby corn say to mama corn?
Where is pop corn?
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