You came here looking for burger jokes and we have scoured the universe (AKA Google) for the best burger jokes online. They cover standard burger jokes, hamburger jokes, Burger King jokes and the not so tasteful horse burger jokes!
There’s even a few unique jokes within the 100+ burger jokes: yes we wrote NEW jokes!!! See the horse burger jokes 1, 2 and 4 for example.
Funny Burger Jokes
Burger Joke 1
How can you tell which Burger Land baseball pitchers are left-handed? They re the one’s wearing the left-handed meats !
Burger Joke 2
Why were the burgers in the refrigerator embarrassed? They saw the salad dressing!
Burger Joke 3
Do they really serve burgers in Transylvania? Very rare-ly.
Burger Joke 4
How do the Rolling Stones like their burgers? Plain – Rolling Stones gather no moss-tard!
Burger Joke 5
How do we know burgers love young people? They re pro-teen!
Burger Joke 6
How do you make a cheeseburger sad? Make it with blue cheese!
Burger Joke 7
How does a burger acquire good taste? With a little seasoning!
Burger Joke 8
How does a pitcher walk a man in Burger Land baseball? He throws four meatballs!
Burger Joke 9
How far do burgers go in school? Through cowlege (then they get their 450 degrees!).
Burger Joke 10
Why was the burger thrown out of the Army? He couldn’t pass mustard! (muster)
Burger Joke 11
What can you say about Ham Burger and Chief Justice Warren Burger? Ham Burger is well done and Chief Justice Warren Burger has done well !
Burger Joke 12
What did they do to the burger who thought he was a rooster? Cook-a-doodle-do!
Burger Joke 13
What did they say about the burger who went skiing for the first time? How the meaty have fallen!
Burger Joke 14
What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army? You’ve got no beef, soldier!
Burger Joke 15
What do burgers think when they are surrounded by gherkins? They think they are in a pickle.
Burger Joke 16
What do some burger eaters have? A Hardee appetite!
Burger Joke 17
What do some people have against cheeseburgers? They say, Burgers can’t be cheesy!
Burger Joke 18
What do they call a meeting among the most brilliant people in Burger Land? A MEATing of the minds!
Burger Joke 19
What do they say about the noise at the Burger Land Super Bowl? It’s PAN-demonium!
Burger Joke 20
What do you use to determine if a refrigerated burger is cold enough? A thermomeater!
Burger Joke 21
What happens when two burgers fall in love? They live together in holy meatrimony!
Burger Joke 22
What kind of a pitch did Sandy Koufax of the old Burger-lyn Dodgers have? A fastball – a sizzler.
Burger Joke 23
What kind of baseball do burgers play? Ketchup baseball!
Burger Joke 24
What old-time song is the burgers favourite? Hammy – as sung by Al Jolson!
Burger Joke 25
What song do burgers sing on the job? Gristle While You Work!
Burger Joke 26
When do burgers quit their jobs? The day they decide to meat LOAF!
Burger Joke 27
Where can a burger get a great night’s sleep? On a bed of lettuce!
Burger Joke 28
Where do the burgers go on New Year’s Eve? To a meat ball!
Burger Joke 29
Where does a burger feel at home? On the range!
Burger Joke 30
Where does a burger go on vacation? The Swiss (cheese) Alps or The Cheeseapeake Valley!
Burger Joke 31
Which burgers are dishonest? Cat-burgers! (burglars)
Burger Joke 32
Which burger is famous for a long nose? Cyrano de Burgerac!
Burger Joke 33
Which burgers can tell your fortune? Medium burgers!
Burger Joke 34
Which burgers love to act? Ham-burgers!
Burger Joke 35
Which cheeseburger makes a big hit in baseball? A double!
Burger Joke 36
Which is the meat patties least favourite day of the week? Fry-day!
Burger Joke 37
Which meatballs get a little tipsy on occasion? The POTTED ones!
Burger Joke 38
Which of our meaty friends are into astrology? Those that are born under the sign of the Ham!
Burger Joke 39
Which people do the burgers hate? The ones who are always putting the bite on them!
Burger Joke 40
Which political discussions between the Russians and Americans keenly interest Burger Land citizens? The SALT talks!
Burger Joke 41
Who can beat any burger at golf? Any LINKS sausage!
Burger Joke 42
Who was the burger’s favourite all-time movie director? Sizzle B. DeMille!
Burger Joke 43
Who wins most of the medals for bravery in Burger Land? The meatball heros!
Burger Joke 44
Why aren’t burgers too good at basketball? Too many turnovers!
Burger Joke 45
Why do burgers laugh when you surround them with pickles? Who knows – maybe they re picklish!
Burger Joke 46
Why do burgers run the gauntlet? To test their meattle!
Burger King Jokes
Burger King Joke 1
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
Burger King Joke 2
Name two tennis stars who are famous in the hamburger world? Bjorn Borger and Billie Jean-o’s Burger King!
Burger King Joke 3
Can you name two burgers who are royalty? Sir Loin and Burger King!
Burger King Joke 4
Yo mamas so old, she knew the Burger King when he was a just a prince.
Burger King Joke 5
Why did the chicken go to Burger King? To see a chicken strip.
Burger King Joke 6
Why did the Hobbit get a job at Burger King? He wanted to be Lord of the Onion Rings
Burger King Joke 7
How does a pitcher walk a man in the Burger King baseball League? He throws four meatballs!
Burger King Joke 8
I farted in Burger King. It was an absolute whopper
Horse Burger Jokes
Horse Burger Joke 1
There’s a new low cost burger released to celebrate the Grand National called “My Lidl Pony”!
Horse Burger Joke 2
The mane news this week is Tesco released a new range of low coast burgers with the TV ad campaign slogan “And They’re Off”!
Horse Burger Joke 3
Dozens of Tesco and Iceland customers were hospitalised after eating a horse meat burger, their condition is said to be stable.
Horse Burger Joke 4
In a recent Twitter poll people were asked “Is eating horse burgers bad your you”? 51% voted “aye” and 49% voted “neigh”, it was a photo finish!
Hamburger Joke 1
Are hamburgers male? Yes, because they re boygers, not girlgers!
Hamburger Joke 2
Can a hamburger marry a hot dog? Only if they have a very frank relationship!
Hamburger Joke 3
Do hamburgers make good vampires? No, because they always find themselves in ghoulash situations!
Hamburger Joke 4
How are UFO’s related to hamburgers? Both are Unidentified Frying Objects!
Hamburger Joke 5
How did the jury find the hamburger? Grill-ty as charred!
Hamburger Joke 6
How do gossipy hamburgers spend their time? They chew the fat.
Hamburger Joke 7
How do they prevent crime in hamburger country? With burger alarms!
Hamburger Joke 8
How do we know that hamburgers love classic music? They re often found at the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!
Hamburger Joke 9
How do you insult a hamburger patty? Call it a meatball!
Hamburger Joke 10
How do you make a hamburger green? Find a yellow cheeseburger and mix it with a blue one!
Hamburger Joke 11
How do you make a hamburger smile? Pickle it gently!
Hamburger Joke 12
Why do hamburgers act brilliantly on stage? They give meaty performances – especially if they are in their prime!
Hamburger Joke 13
Why do hamburgers feel sad at barbecues? They get to meet their old flames!
Hamburger Joke 14
Why do hamburgers make good baseball players? They re great at the plate!
Hamburger Joke 15
Why do hamburgers make poor pigeons? They won’t talk no matter how you grill them!
Hamburger Joke 16
Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!
Hamburger Joke 17
Why is President Carter important to Hamburger Land in April? One the opening day of the baseball season, he throws out the first meatball!
Hamburger Joke 18
How do we know hamburgers have high IQ s? They loin fast!
Hamburger Joke 19
How was the hamburger murdered? First it was rolled, then smothered in onions
Hamburger Joke 20
In what school subjects does the teacher say, Well done, hamburgers ? A wide range of subjects – meatyeval, history, meatematics and word grill.
Hamburger Joke 21
Is it proper to eat a hamburger with your fingers? No, you should eat your fingers separately!
Hamburger Joke 22
Is there a way to make a hamburger do the Hula? Sure, order a burger and a shake!
Hamburger Joke 23
Seriously, when the crooked hamburger took it on the 1am, where did it go? Heidelburg-er, Germany!
Hamburger Joke 24
What are some outstanding hamburger colleges? Brandeis, Cowlifornia State, Hoofstra, Pen State, Ranchelaer Polytechnic, Burgereley and Moosouri!
Hamburger Joke 25
What did the hamburger say when it found out that most people liked hamburgers better than frankfurters? Hot dog!
Hamburger Joke 26
What did the hamburger say when it pleaded not guilty ? I’ve been flamed!
Hamburger Joke 27
What did the hamburgers say to the butcher who acted on a TV show? Welcome back, Cutter!
Hamburger Joke 28
What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league? Rink injustice!
Hamburger Joke 29
What do hamburger workers say on Monday morning? Well, it’s back to the old grind!
Hamburger Joke 30
What famous movie did the hamburger meat think of when they took it out of the freezer? They Fry Who Cam in from the Cold!
Hamburger Joke 31
What great song is associated with hamburgers and baseball? Steak Me Out to the Ballgame !
Hamburger Joke 32
What is a hamburger’s favourite story? Hansel and Gristle!
Hamburger Joke 33
What is the hamburgers most familiar song? Home on the Range !
Hamburger Joke 34
What is the hamburgers motto? If at first you don’t succeed, fry, fry again!
Hamburger Joke 35
What kind of company is a 24 hours hamburger joint? Fry-by-night!
Hamburger Joke 36
What kind of girl does a hamburger like? Any girl named Patty!
Hamburger Joke 37
What system do they teach in Hamburger High’s math courses? The meatric system, silly!
Hamburger Joke 38
When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency? When the chips are down!
Hamburger Joke 39
When do hamburgers most enjoy watching TV? During PRIME time!
Hamburger Joke 40
When does a hamburger wear a look like a smile button? When somebody says, Well done !
Hamburger Joke 41
When the crooked hamburger took it on the lamb , where did it go? Oh, ewe know!
Hamburger Joke 42
Which baseball team is currently the favourite with hamburger fans? The Cincinnati Reds -because they re the Big Bread Machine!
Hamburger Joke 43
Which type of comedy leaves a hamburger cold? BITING humour!
Hamburger Joke 44
Who are the hamburgers favourite people? Vegetarians!
Hamburger Joke 45
Who do hamburgers love on TV? Archie Bunker’s son-in-law, the meathead!
Hamburger Joke 46
Who is the hamburgers favourite actress? Candice Berger!
Hamburger Joke 47
Why are hamburgers essential to football? Because the game is played on a griddle-iron!
Hamburger Joke 48
Why can any hamburger run the mile in under four minutes? Because it’s a FAST food!
Hamburger Joke 49
Why did the pro football player from the last-place team drop pieces of hamburger into his soup? He wanted to know how it felt to take part in a Soup-er Bowl!