Funny Irish Joke 01
Finnegin: Me wife has a terrible habit of staying up ’til two o’clock in the morning. I can’t break her of it.
Sean: What on earth is she doin’ at that time?
Finnegin: Waitin’ for me to come home.
Funny Irish Joke 02
First Irish Farmer: “My cow fell down a hole and I had to shoot it.”
Second Irish Farmer: “Did you shoot it in the hole?”
First Irish Farmer: ” No, in the head.”
Funny Irish Joke 03
Incomprehensibly, the last coach of the train on a normal route kept getting smashed up by vandals.
A porter came up with an idea. “Why don’t we leave the last coach off!”
Funny Irish Joke 04
Me Ma wanted me to be a priest.
Can you imagine?
Here I hafta give up all hope of a sex life, then once a week ya gotta let people come in and tell you all about theirs!
Funny Irish Joke 05
O’Connell was staggering home with a small Paddy in his back pocket when he slipped and fell heavily.
Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running down his leg.
“Please, God,” he implored, “let it be blood!”
Funny Irish Joke 06
Reilly went to trial for armed robbery.
The jury foreman came out and announced, “Not guilty.”
“Oh my!” shouted Reilly.
“Does that mean I get to keep the money?”
Funny Irish Joke 07
Slaney phoned the maternity ward at the hospital.
“Quick!” He said.
“Send an ambulance, me wife is about to have a baby!”
“Is this her first baby?” the intern asked.
“No ya idjit, this is her husband, Kevin”!
Funny Irish Joke 08
The late Bishop Sheen stated that the reason the Irish fight among themselves, is because that way, they’re always assured of having a worthy opponent.
Funny Irish Joke 09
Two lawyers standing before an Irish judge got into a fierce argument.
At last one lawyer lost his temper and shouted, “Sir you are the biggest fool that I have set eyes on.”
“Order, order,” said the Irish judge.
“You seem to forget that I am in the room.”
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