Kids Monster Joke 1
What do you call a mouse that can pick up a monster?
Kids Monster Joke 2
MRS MONSTER TO MR MONSTER: Try to be nice to my mother when she visits us this weekend, dear. Fall down when she hits you.
Kids Monster Joke 3
How do you address a monster?
Kids Monster Joke 4
What’s big and hairy and goes beep beep?
A monster in a traffic jam.
Kids Monster Joke 5
Waiter on ocean liner: Would you like the menu, sir?
Monster: No thanks, just bring me the passenger list.
Kids Monster Joke 6
How do you stop a monster from smelling?
Cut off his nose.
Kids Monster Joke 7
What does a monster mom say to her kids at dinnertime?
Don’t talk with someone in your mouth.
Kids Monster Joke 8
Little monster: Mom, why can’t we have dustbins like everyone else?
Mother monster: Less talking, more eating please.
Kids Monster Joke 9
The monster spent a fortune on deodorants before he found out that people didn’t like him anyway.
Kids Monster Joke 10
What can a monster do that you can’t do?
Count up to 25 on his fingers.
Kids Monster Joke 11
FIRST HUMAN BOY: I can lift a monster with one hand.
SECOND HUMAN BOY: Bet you can’t!
FIRST HUMAN BOY: Find me a monster with one hand and I’ll prove it.
Kids Monster Joke 12
What do you get if you cross a monster with a flea?
Lots of very worried dogs.
Kids Monster Joke 13
Monster: Where do fleas go in winter?
Werewolf: Search me!
Kids Monster Joke 14
How do you stop a monster digging up your garden?
Take his spade away.
Kids Monster Joke 15
What should you do if a monster runs through your front door?
Run through the back door.
Kids Monster Joke 16
Did you hear about the monster who had twelve arms and no legs?
He was all fingers and thumbs.
Kids Monster Joke 17
Did you hear about the monster who went to a holiday camp?
He won the ugly mug and knobbly knees competition and he wasn’t even entered.
Kids Monster Joke 18
Did you hear the joke about the two monsters who crashed?
They fell off a cliff, boom, boom.
Kids Monster Joke 19
How do you tell a good monster from a bad one?
If it’s a good one you will be able to talk about it later!
Kids Monster Joke 20
First monster: I have a hunch.
Second monster: I thought you were a funny shape.
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