Teeth Joke 1
Fan: I’ve always admired you. Are your teeth your own? Actor: Whose do you think they are?
Teeth Joke 2
What did the vampire call his false teeth? A new fangled device.
Teeth Joke 3
What happened to the man who put his false teeth in backwards? He ate himself!
Teeth Joke 4
Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed? To catch her false teeth.
Teeth Joke 5
A man coughed violently, and his false teeth shot across the room and smashed against the wall. “Oh, dear,” he said, “whatever shall I do? I can’t afford a new set.” “Don’t worry,” said his friend. “I ll get a pair from my brother for you.” The next day the friend came back with the teeth, which fitted perfectly. “This is wonderful,” said the man. “Your brother must be a very good dentist.” “Oh, he’s not a dentist,” replied the friend, “he’s an undertaker.”
Teeth Joke 6
Why didn’t the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren’t loose.
Teeth Joke 7
What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out? He ate the dentist.
Teeth Joke 8
What did one tooth say to the other? Get your cap on, the dentist is taking us out tonight.
Teeth Joke 9
Why does a vampire clean his teeth three times a day? To prevent bat breath.
Teeth Joke 10
Why do you forget a tooth, as soon as the dentist pulls it out? Because it goes right out of your head.
Teeth Joke 11
What’s the best thing to put into a pizza? Your teeth.
Teeth Joke 12
Patient: Tell me honestly, how am I? Dentist: Your teeth are fine, but your gums will have to come out.
Teeth Joke 13
What sort of an act do you do? I bend over backwards and pick up a handkerchief with my teeth. Anything else? Then I bend over backwards and pick up my teeth.
Teeth Joke 14
Your teeth are like the stars, he said, As he pressed her hand, so white. He spoke the truth, for, like the stars, Her teeth came out at night!
Teeth Joke 15
Why did the termite eat a sofa and two chairs? It had a suite tooth.
Teeth Joke 16
What comes out at night and goes Munch, munch, ouch! A vampire with a rotten tooth.
Teeth Joke 17
What’s the difference between a vampire with toothache and a rainstorm? One roars with pain and the other pours with rain.
Teeth Joke 18
What do you get it you cross a porcupine with a giraffe? A long necked toothbrush.
Teeth Joke 19
What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth? Hard cheese.
Teeth Joke 20
What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano? He said, “Darling, you’ve got lovely teeth.”
Teeth Joke 21
A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth. Turning to the man next to him he said, “I forgot my teeth.” The man said, “No problem.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of false teeth. “Try these,” he said. The speaker tried them. “Too loose,” he said. The man then said, “I have another pair – try these.” The speaker tried them and responded, “Too tight.” The man was not taken back at all. He then said, “I have one more pair. Try them.” The speaker said, “They fit perfectly.”With that he ate his meal and gave his speech. After the dinner meeting was over, the speaker went over to thank the man who had helped him. “I want to thank you for coming to my aid. Where is your office? I’ve been looking for a good dentist.” The man replied, “I m not a dentist. I m an undertaker.”
Teeth Joke 22
Why is 4,840 square yards like a bad tooth ? Because it is an acre.
Teeth Joke 23
What has teeth but no mouth? A comb or a saw.
Teeth Joke 24
What did one tooth say to the other tooth? “Thar’s gold in them thar fills.”
Teeth Joke 25
What did the tooth say to the dentist? “Fill er up!”
Teeth Joke 26
How does Snoop Dogg keep his canine teeth white? BLEEEEEE-YATCH!
Teeth Joke 27
Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes. “What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice,” she maliciously remarked. “Are they real?” Yes, nodded Lady Peel. “Of course,” the dowager declared, “you can always tell real pearls by biting them. May I try?” “Gladly,” Lady Peel replied. “But remember, Duchess, you can’t tell real pearls with false teeth.”
Teeth Joke 28
Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?…Son: I don’t know. The dentist kept it
Teeth Joke 29
Why are vampires like false teeth? They all come out at night.
Teeth Joke 30
Why is a toothless dog like a tree? It has more bark than bite.
Teeth Joke 31
How can you get a set of teeth put in for free? Smack a monster.
Teeth Joke 32
Why didn’t the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren’t loose.
Teeth Joke 33
Willie: “I have an awful toothache.” Tommie: “I d have it taken out if it was mine.” Willie: “Yes, if it was yours, I would, too.”
Teeth Joke 34
What game do you play if you don’t take care of your teeth? Tooth (truth) or Consequences.
Teeth Joke 35
What helps keep your teeth together? Toothpaste.
Teeth Joke 36
Why are false teeth like stars? Because they come out at night.
Teeth Joke 37
What do you get if you cross teeth with candy ? Dental floss !
Teeth Joke 38
What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had !
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